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January 3rd – Happy Birthday Bradley Govindarajulu!

Bradley

Man, 20 years and just like that.. as a parent, you hear many people say time flies. I can attest to it; it sure does. I can remember the hubby, and I’s first conversation about having kids as if it were yesterday, and I was telling him I definitely wanted 10! I went on to tell him if he wasn’t open-minded to 10, then we probably should not waste one another’s time. Funny how you hit 5 and realize how quickly love has taught you to compromise.

Before we had Bradley, I truly wished for a little boy, always knew I wanted to name my son Bradley after a doctor who made a huge impact on my life personally. Giving him his first and middle name after two very influential people with doctorate degrees, it’s a lot to own that is for sure. Added by the pressure of being the firstborn boy into an Indian family, I won’t lie and say those are easy shoes to fill.

We have watched him grow over the last 20 years from our arms to now him being able to carry me in his. I don’t feel that 20 years is even enough to teach your child all the things they truly need to know. At this age, I think that as a parent, you become the back seat driver that no one really wants to transport. You quickly learn to bite your tongue to keep them from never telling or sharing anything with you because at this point; they are no longer asking your opinion rather just wanting you to lend an ear and always know you are near. It’s hard… to move from a position of authority with a certain amount of control forward into allowing the very lives you’ve learned to protect, serve, and bubble to evolve into a spectator sport. I’m trying; it is a work in progress, no doubt, and comes with a certain amount of crying.

What I can say and promise is that I, as your Mom I will continue to keep trying, I will continue to love you unconditionally, and always be a safe place for you to call or fall. I loved you first and I will love you last, and I will cherish all the things we have done both present and past. I step into this new phase of parenting constantly reminding myself that I was once there too – before I had you.

Happy 20th Birthday GOVI!

Love – Mom (and of course, Dad too!)

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